Leaving a Life Lived Abroad | The Emotional Toll of Repatriation

What does it feel like to walk away from a life lived abroad? Simply put? A lot. Today marks 18 months since we boarded a plane back to the US. After seven years of living as a Scandinavian – Oregon is seeping back in, getting under my skin. I’m embracing the spaces, places, and people we missed. I won’t sugarcoat it, there have been overwhelming moments, days, and maybe whole months of deep grief. Someone remind me next winter that this time of year is just as difficult here as it was in Denmark. I don’t believe in ignoring those hard feelings and I let them wash in. Safe in my experience that those tides (eventually) roll back out.

I’ll admit, I thought I’d be further along by now. Still, I’m squarely in the middle of processing my move “home.” But Copenhagen was home too. For seven years. So from the beginning, the emotions are complicated and twisty. Let’s get into it. But first, let’s start with the definition of repatriation.

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What not to ask a repat, but you will anyway

Have you lived around the world? Beyond your passport country? Have you repatriated? Have you moved back?

This list is for you.

This list is also for those of you who know someone moving back from living elsewhere in the world. You may not know these questions, but we do. We hear them OFTEN. And usually in a semi-specific order. You think I jest. But there is a fairly standard set of inquiries repats get when returning from their life lived abroad.

Note I did not say – return home. To have any measure of success when choosing to thrive in a place different from where you grew up, one must consider it “home” in each place they land. I said – move back. To return. To a place. Repatriate.

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